Sideline

I’m so scared.

Scared to care, to feel and to love.

And I guess it’s because when I feel, care and love

I do it much stronger than the average person.

I feel everything from pain to love so strong

and I have let it become my weakness

instead of making it my greatest strength.

But I’m scared.

I’m scared to get rejected, to let myself feel and fall yet again.

But this is not a life.

to see everybody else living their life

while i’m just at the side.

In everything else I’m part of the game, life.

But when it comes to love I am just someone who is watching on the sideline.

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I feel it.

I feel it. 

I feel it more and more. 

I feel the power it’s getting. 

I need to get out. 

But I can’t. 

Nobody can help me 

besides myself. 

 

I feel it. 

I feel it consuming me. 

I feel it getting stronger. 

I don’t want it to be like this. 

But I’m too weak to let go

and to weak to forget. 

 

I love too much.

I think too much. 

I feel too much. 

It’s my weakness and my strength. 

I can’t let things go. 

It consumes me

It affects me. 

It troubles me. 

 

Where am I supposed to end up?

No direction 

no one to turn to 

no shoulders to cry on. 

People don’t understand 

people don’t care. 

It’s not their life

their problems. 

 

It’s mine alone. 

I need to fight on my own. 

Fight for a world with light

fight for happiness 

and i need above all

to fight for love and life