Sorry seems to be the hardest word

I’m mad. 

I’m frustrated. 

I’m confused. 

And I’m at a crossroad this point in my life

and I don’t know what to do from here.

 

I’m not home 

in familar settings 

or with friends or family. 

I’m in this unknown place 

where everybody is fake. 

Everybody talks behind each others back 

and nobody says how they really feel. 

 

Then there you are 

you are my confidant. 

You are the person I trust 

You are the person who sees everything 

when I’m down and when I’m truly happy. 

Others doesn’t notice 

because they don’t see it or doesn’t care. 

 

You’ve seen me cry 

You held me tight 

and told me everything would be okay

when I was at my worst. 

I’m getting better and better everyday 

like they say time heals everything. 

 

But I often get more mad

because I blame myself for not treating you better. 

I know in the moment I did something wrong

but I have flaws 

and I hate to admit when I’m wrong. 

 

You are my best friend

the person I confide to

whether it’s happy or sad news. 

I’ve told you stuff I have never told anybody 

and it felt good 

because all you did 

was just to listen, hug me 

and you told me everything would be okay. 

 

So this is me apologizing. 

Apologizing for my mistakes

and for the ones I will make

because I’m not perfect.

I’m stubborn and I have a temper

and I feel everything so strongly.

And I have a power to take it out on the people

who are closets to me.  

 

But know that you will always be my friend

the friend who was there in the good and the bad times 

for that I cannot express how much it means to me. 

 

Sorry is the hardest word for me to express in this world. 

I may say it daily but when it’s truthful and comes from within 

it’s the hardest thing for me to do. 

So this is my way of apologizing to you 

because you are an amazing friend 

and you should be treated like that everyday.